“Thanks for Listening”
Prayer journal of Susanne Fisher Berger, friend of God
November 17, 1954 - July 31, 2021
Susanne left us a treasure trove in her prayer journal from her journey over the last year. I share this with you that you might be inspired by her heart for God, and her unwavering hope and thankfulness. May He use her deep faith to draw you to love and trust Him too.
~Bruce
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.” Romans 15:13
“Thanks for listening, I hope those verses will encourage you even today.”
June 14, 2020
Thank you for praying. Isn’t God good to provide sister-friends to listen and pray with us! Your calls, texts, cards, meals, etc. are received with deep gratitude. They are tangible means of encouragement and joy!
Along with a continued focus on Psalm 18, I’m reading Isaiah. I see much “me-focus” or pride in the Israelites throughout Isaiah. That said, I acknowledge my blindness to my own prideful ways. God in His mercy points those ways out to me. One consistent tool He uses is this illness and treatment. He uses it to reset my thinking.
How? Isaiah 46:3,4 say this: “Listen to Me… you who have been borne by Me from before your birth, carried by Me from the womb: til you grow old I am He, and when white hairs come, I will carry you still. I have made you and I will bear the burden, I will carry you and bring you to safety.”
So when my thoughts race: “Will radiation be effective? What will follow-up be? More chemo? Will I have energy to ‘do' life?” He gently turns me back to His sufficiency. I pridefully take on the burden of fixing myself. He jolts me into realizing that He takes my burden and bears it daily (Ps. 68:19-20). No days off. He never sleeps. My job is to give it to Him.
When I let God bear my burdens, that brings Him glory. Please pray I will!
July 2, 2020
Your prayers for my peace, comfort and healing were and are so appreciated. We all have trials and challenges. I’m truly humbled that you’d take the time to pray for me.
As I transition from active treatment to a “watchful waiting” period, I realize we are all there — watchfully waiting, moving forward. Waiting and working for the Kingdom coming, as God gives strength.
Like you, I rejoice that the cross makes all the difference. We wait and work with purpose and hope. We are new creations in Christ; the old has passed away, the new has come! Our perspective is eternal and our burdens light in Him.
September 25, 2020
Since Wednesday, Paul’s phrase has been popping into my head, “I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am.” Philippians 4:11. He wrote it while in prison! He goes on to say he has “learned the secret…of having abundance & suffering need.” (v. 12). I find his phrasing significant: he has learned to be content. He doesn’t say “I feel content in every circumstance.” That helps me.
The Lord is my Teacher - none better - and while feeling content is a bonus, I am the most grateful, feelings aside, for a deep, settled contentment He is teaching me. Especially now, when news received is not what I’d hoped, I want to learn contentment; He wants to teach me. So I am in a good place to learn. While not a huge fan of waiting, it is made easier as God reminds me nothing slips past His notice; and as I love to remember, He is FOR me. FOR us! (Rom. 8:31)
Thanks again for your prayers. I’m praying that I keep God’s perspective. When fear and "what ifs” plague me, I pray He turns me towards gratitude and contentment - quickly! I don’t want to waste precious time on unfruitful roads. I believe He will steer me instead towards encouraging ones!
October 15, 2020
“Out of the depths I have cried to Thee, O Lord. Lord, hear my voice! … I wait for the Lord, my soul does wait, and in His word do I hope.” Psalm 130:1,2 & 5
Friends,
Sometimes our best prayer is short - “Lord have mercy” or simply “Jesus.” He hears and acts. Those are my prayers in recent days.
November 6, 2020
Thank you for your prayers as God keeps Bruce & me in this holding pattern. We would not have chosen this path but we absolutely desire to trust Him that it is for our good. Pray we will trust God ruthlessly. Please pray we will find His mercies new every morning, living in the moment.
November 19, 2020
This week I was fixing dinner (yes, I do occasionally cook) and feeling pretty low. An unwelcome combo of pity-party and fear-fest was making itself at home in my head & I was tired. Reached in my pocket to retrieve a pen and instead found a forgotten Scripture from a few months back. The Holy Spirit was giving me a gentle and necessary forehead slap.
He reminded me, God only asks of me that which is doable and for my best. I realized it wasn’t pity or even well-meaning commiseration on how tough life can be that I needed. I took a mental U-turn, put the Scripture on my kitchen counter where I could not escape it. I began thanking God (begrudgingly at first, then for real!) for so many blessings. Gifts like you praying for me faithfully.
Dinner was ready and the list kept going in my head. God is truly SO good to me; what can I say in response? What compares to the glory of God revealed in Jesus? What do I have, including the promise of eternal life with Him - where all things are made new - that He has not provided?
So I Thess. 5 has spoken to me recently. As has a simple quote from Robert M. McCheyne (Scotsman who could really roll his rrrrr’s), here it is:
“If I could hear Christ praying for me in the next room, I would not fear a million enemies. Yet distance makes no difference. He is praying for me.”
That is exactly why I can rejoice always.
November 30, 2020
2020 has just been crazy, yet God remains faithful. I’m amazed at His goodness even in my distress. I need to remember this promise from Isaiah I have held to over the years. I hope it comforts you, too:
"In all their affliction (distress), He too was afflicted (distressed); and the angel of His presence saved them. In His love and His mercy, He redeemed them. He lifted them up and carried them all the days of old.” Isaiah 63:9
December 2, 2020
I continue realizing how much I can allow my circumstances to dictate my peace of mind. I know you understand, as we all have our stuff. I am just a mess without Jesus. I have been thinking about how He makes all the difference in my life. He offers Himself daily, freely, moment-by-moment and He is everything I need.
I’m beginning to understand why John stressed that “He must increase while I must decrease.” I can be so circumstance-focused. Yet always I have the option to return to a perspective that all is well, ultimately. We are a blessed and secure people, when we know Jesus. Pray I cling to that mindset, rejecting the roller-coaster one that my circumstances offer me.
December 5, 2020
Pray that I can take one day at a time, that above all, I will want what the Lord wants for me!
February 15, 2021
My sister gave me a coffee mug for Christmas that says “Count Your Blessings.” As I literally name and count them, often my blessings are tangible: like people and events. Each of you is a blessing to Bruce & me, for example. We are humbled that you would take the time to pray & care for us.
But this morning I thought about the blessing of perspective. The solid assurance of an eternal perspective is huge, especially when living with cancer. Someone has said that many Christians live as “practical atheists.” That is, calling themselves Christians but living as if life-on-earth is all that matters. I am certainly guilty of that at times and want to re-route my thinking.
God alone can give me the ability to frame each event and circumstance, no matter how it looks at the time, as coming to me from Him who is good & does all things well. I read Psalm 145 today and noticed this truth:
"Everything God does is right— the trademark on all his works is love. God’s there, listening for all who pray, for all who pray and mean it." Psalm 145:17,18, The Message
Nothing compares to knowing my future is bright and secure. I am in the hands of a God who is 100% FOR me!
Thanks for listening & allowing me to tell myself this truth today.
April 24, 2021
Bruce & I continue to desire to trust God as we walk together through this, so please pray for our peace, joy and our eyes to be focused on the Lord. It’s a journey full of ups and downs. Also, pray especially for our wisdom in conveying my progress & my challenges to our children.
Finally, I saw something significant about Psalm 34: 4, 6. This wisdom courtesy of Amy Carmichael. The Psalm reads “I sought the Lord, and He answered me and delivered me from all my fears. This poor man cried (David wrote this when in fear for his life) and the Lord heard him, and saved him out of all his troubles.”
Amy writes: My fear is not yours, but nearly everyone has, somewhere inside, a weary little fear which keeps cropping up. But every time the fear pushes out its head, there, waiting to end it, is that glorious word, “delivered from all my fears.” Not from some, or from most but from all."
She goes on to say about v. 6: We may have to pass through the waters, but we shall be delivered out of them. They will not overflow us. "This poor man cried and the Lord heard him and saved him out of all his troubles.” There again, it is not out of some, or out of most but out of all.
May 6, 2021
God continues giving me His peace. I wander off into “what-if’s” at times. I get discouraged and always He faithfully pulls me back up, like the patient Father He is. He reminds me to speak boldly to Him about where I am and what I desire. What a great God we are privileged to know and serve! I so want to keep my eyes on Him.
Here’s a reminder from my kitchen, words I see every day :) Lots of encouragement from the book of Isaiah. “For the mountains may be moved and the hills may shake, but My loving of peace will not be shaken” says the Lord who has compassion on you.” Isaiah 54:10
Love to all, Susanne
May 13, 2021
I was encouraged this week in a Bible study of Ephesians 1. Look how Paul prayed, from a Roman prison, for his Ephesian brothers and sisters.
From my read of Eph. 1:15-21, he gifted them with his prayers for a spirit of wisdom & revelation to know Jesus. He prayed for the eyes of their hearts to open to see & know God’s great hope and power. He prayed God would reveal to them how rich an inheritance they have in Him. What an inheritance we have indeed and what a privilege to pray for each other!
Thanks for listening, I hope those verses will encourage you even today.
June 3, 2021
I would appreciate your prayers that I choose faith over fear as we navigate this development. And specifically that my faith rests on the knowledge that the Lord has gone ahead of me - which He promises He has - and He will never leave me. I think of Deuteronomy 31:8 and picture Him already there at the Cancer Center, reassuring me. Ready to reveal His good next steps for me.
I realize how changeable life on this planet is for us all. Hebrews 13:8 comes to mind, how unchangeable is our Savior! This journey with cancer is no fun & full of changes; yet I truly experience how belonging to Him makes all the difference. Even as I type those words I realize how easily I can forget them when circumstances don’t go “my” way. I love how the Lord understands and lovingly reminds me that His plans, even when difficult, are for my good and His glory. I can fully trust Him in that knowledge.
June 5, 2021
Thank you for continuing to pray for our wisdom to process info; for my strength amidst fatigue and for us to cling to “faith, not fear” as I mentioned in my last update. I am comforted by Psalm 18 and especially knowing, as it says right at the beginning, that not only does the Lord give me strength, He IS my strength! What a gift!
June 22, 2021
So now we have a plan - I am reminded, lest I get too comfortable with my plans, of the truth of Proverbs 19:21 "Many are the plans in the mind of a man (woman), but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand." So please pray I can hold my plans loosely, while trusting the Lord’s good purposes for me.
June 27, 2021
I read Psalm 27 this evening: “The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the defense [refuge] of my life; whom shall I dread?” I want to dread nothing, fear nothing as I cling to the light, salvation and refuge that the Lord has always been - and will always be! - to me. He wants to be all of that to each of us. Please pray the Lord will equip me to trust Him fully & completely.
July 2, 2021
My prayer is that I stay in step with the Lord, trusting Him for each step & choice along this unknown path. Unknown to me, completely known to Him. There is great comfort in that truth. He will not let go of me; I want to keep clinging to Him! There are certainly details to pray for, like quick scheduling, good rest, better breathing, etc. But I learn again & again that clinging to His side even without understanding the path brings me His great peace. And that is priceless.
July 22, 2021
I continue to request and appreciate your prayers for clarity, comfort and encouragement.
I remain thankful that the Lord is in control in this difficult situation and the knowledge that even in this circumstance that I wouldn’t choose, I am still living in the shelter of the Most High, causing me to dwell in the shadow of the Almighty.
Thank you all for the many ways you have expressed your concern and love for me and my family through meals, flowers, cards, gifts, texts, emails, etc.
July 27, 2021
Although her physical situation is difficult, Susanne is at peace, knowing the Lord is at her side and is a God of comfort (Isaiah 66:13; Psalm 23:4). She appreciates your prayers for physical comfort and that she would release this to God and not feel like she needs to continue fighting. She realizes she is firmly in the shadow of God’s wings (Psalm 17:8), held close by his loving arms (Isaiah 40:11).
Susanne and Bruce are grateful for the wonderful, caring support of family and friends. Thank you!
July 31, 2021
Susanne went to be with our Lord last night. Bruce and her children were by her side. She was blessed and honored that her family was present and so many good friends were able to visit with her and, though weak, was able to enjoy that time and have the opportunity to say good-bye.
Bruce and the family are comforted knowing that Susanne rests in the loving, everlasting arms of Jesus and is at perfect peace, looking forward to spending eternity with her brothers and sisters in Christ.
Thank you each so much for your cards, thoughts, prayers, texts, calls, emails, meals, flowers and the many other ways so many of you have supported the Berger family. They are truly grateful.
“You keep her in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on You because she trusts in You. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting rock.” Isaiah 26:3,4
“In this [salvation] you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.” I Peter 1:6,7
“Blessed in the eyes of the Lord is the death of His saints.” Psalm 116:15